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Posted: March 6th, 2010, 10:00pm MST by jrod
Due to time zones and sky programming, I’ve been watching the Zimbabwe tour of the Windies instead of the Australian tour of New Zealand.
This explains the Ray Price love.
Until tonight Zimbabwe have been kicking ass, but they still don’t like facing Kemar Roach.
This is probably not the best ad for Grey-Nicolls.
Cheers to ducking beamers for this.
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Posted: March 5th, 2010, 10:49pm MST by jrod
Most of that is true.
One time CWB writer Andrew Fernando has started a blog.
His latest post is about him describing Satan to a little kid:
“Around two years ago, a kid that I looked after asked me what I thought Satan would look like if he took human form. I thought about it for a while and gave a somewhat descriptive answer. “He would be of average height,” I said, “maybe even a bit on the short side.” “He would be pretty hairy, have dark, devious, squinty eyes and
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Posted: March 4th, 2010, 12:10am MST by jrod
I suspect I am not the only person who has noticed that finger spinners are taking over the world.
Daniel Vettori has annex New Zealand. Shakib Al-Hasan is turning himself into a minnow Keith Miller. Graeme Swann was struggling to fill the dodgy back bar of dodgy pubs 2 years ago, now he can fill stadiums. Paul Harris is perhaps the freakiest freak ever, and he takes wickets. Nathan Hauritz is Nathan Hauritz, and no one can take that away from him. And now even the ICC is being handed to a rubbish offspinner.
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Posted: March 3rd, 2010, 1:50am MST by jrod
Picking John Howard for the top ICC job is genius.
You might not think that would be my opening line, but think about it, the Australians have picked the one man who is way more of a cunt than Lalit Modi.
Just finding that person is hard, but then convincing him to take the job takes a special effort.
To be a cricket administrator these days you need to be either dictated to by big business, adept of strangling people with red tape or just evil. The ICC should be ecstatic they have
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Is Scott Styris the angriest man ever to play international cricket?
Well, maybe not ‘angriest’, but ‘angriest-looking’, because either I always choose to look at him at the wrong moment, or he permanently has a face like a pissed-off garden gnome.
Batting, bowling or fielding, you get the feeling that he plays the game with a scowl on his face and thunder in his heart.
Even as he was steering the Black Caps to victory yesterday, there was a black cloud hanging over his head, demonstrating his fury at only getting to play
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I freely admit that, fortunately, I have absolutely no idea what sex feels like for a woman, let alone what really bad sex feels like for one. But I am pretty sure that it goes something along the lines of a long, slow, build-up that sets every nerve ending on edge, followed by frenetic excitement which builds towards a tremendous moment of ecstasy and release of tension, only for the other party to get there first and finish off, just as you were about to meet your own glorious climax.
I’m also pretty sure that this must
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Andrew Flintoff just gave an interview to BBC Radio, in which he admitted that he was planning for the possibility that he might not be able to come back from his current knee problem.
This is, quite possibly, the most interesting thing that Flintoff has ever said in an interview – certainly in an interview given whilst sober. Previously, he’s always been hugely bullish about his prospects of coming back from any operation. It seems that the op he had the day after the Oval Test failing and having to have a second, more major, one has
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There is no doubt that for most of us watching a great cricket game brings on similar feelings to that of a confused teenage girl reading Twilight.
Even if that game is a T20. If it has great performances, changes of momentum and a close finish most of us will enjoy it.
This makes the T20 match between Australia and New Zealand the sort of match that gets ratings up.
The ICC will probably think this is the perfect match of cricket. They probably have a scientist trying to clone it.
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Kamran Akmal is in his hotel room watching repeats of the Shield (Mackie is doing something dodgy, again) after day 2 of the 2nd Test against Australia.
Kamran: Ahoy hoy.
Mysterious Sounding Dude: Mr Akmal, the chickens are coming home to roost.
Kamran: What fucken chickens.
Mysterious Sounding Dude: We need you to lose this match.
Kamran: This is Pakistan; we can probably lose it from here anyway.
Mysterious Sounding Dude: No, you must ensure. This is very important, I wouldn’t be calling you if it was not, that would be rude. Please lose.
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As seen on cricinfo; inspired by the dude who asked about saw:
One killer. Five cricketers. One house. Who will last?
When Virender Sehwag, and four other cricketers who aren’t Virender Sehwag, wake up in an old creepy mansion they have to face the toughest test of their lives.
Virender, Sulieman, Brad, Daniel, and Shahid all find themselves victims of cruel cricket related horror madness. Are they willing to change the way they play the game to survive. This is the horror film that puts the balls in the right area.
Sulieman Benn wakes up in the end of
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Until today, I didn’t realise that I had been present at the end of a legend’s career – or at least his Test career.
I was kind of there for the start of it, too. I can’t think that I have done that for too many others, if any.
The legend is the one and only Jeffrey Robert Thomson. I may have picked up commentary on some of his debut, but I doubt it. I do know that I listened to his third Test, in Perth in 1974, because I remember playing with the tuning knob
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If I was a fast bowler I’d like to think I’d be like Shaun Tait or Shoaib Ahktar, erratic, a little lazy, far from stable, and only good on certain days.
Brett Lee chose a different path. He chose to try really hard, be consistent and stay humble.
There are few other proper quick bowlers who could ever be called earnest in the way Brett can. The man was fast, neat, sweaty desperation.
I can’t say Lee was ever one of my favourite cricketers, I can’t say he was an all time great of the game, but I can say
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Until today, the one thing missing from Sachin Tendulkar’s extensive cricketing portfolio was a proper world record, one that counted for most people.
Ok, so he’s scored more Test tons than anyone else. On the other hand, not one of those 47 hundreds has seen him pass 250. Granted, neither did Border or Waugh, but neither of them aspired to be regarded as the greatest Test batsman of all time.
And when you think of the greatest ODI batsmen of all time, you probably think of the power hitters, the Richardses, Jayasurias and Gilchrists of this world.
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Usually in a moment like this I would try and write some epic piece.
Not today.
Sachin Tendulkar made 200* in a one day international.
There is nothing to say.
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So, the international season in Australia has come to an end, and I’m drinking to it. Not because of the unbeaten Aussie summer. Thrashing two mediocre teams is hardly cause for celebration. No, because it means the end of the most annoying experiment in cricket viewing since, well, ever.
Bloody heart rate monitors.
What, I mean what, is the point of this idiocy? The whole point of introducing any sort of technology into a sport is to make it in some way better for the spectator. HawkEye, HotSpot, slo-mo cameras, they all serve this purpose.
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That should be the beginning and end of the story.
Yes it is a impressive statistical achievement, but so would it be if a kid said he had masturbated every day from the age of 11 to 16.
In the end you are pretty much only beating yourself.
The West Indies came to Australia without a bowling attack, carried some strike breakers, blooded some kids and had a captain who turned up in time for the toss.
They played well at times, but ultimately look like a team that needed the
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Part of the reason I started on this ridiculous question-answering thing is because I felt like I was in a rut.
Writing is like batting or cleaning your teeth; some times you do it better than others.
I thought the question thing might help.
And the weirdest thing has happened, I found out that not only do I like Simon Katich now; I find his whole story inspiring.
I was just answering this question, and then I looked at my answer; it shocked me.
I found Katich
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Every year the Wisden cricketer does an equipment guide.
This year, with my sponsor in mind, I took a big interest in the whole thing.
Get over to mountain chickens to read my take.
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I have said two matches is not a series, and today it is all I can think of.
This could have been one of the best series in the history of world cricket; instead we are stuck with two games.
Look at what we got:
Batsmen playing so well you feel they don’t even need to be looking at the ball to hit it.
Both team collapsing at times.
Fast bowlers bullying the opposition at times, then getting smashed.
Spinners controlling the scoreboard.
One team
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